Good friends are hard to find and difficult friends can be a nightmare to ditch.

I’m losing one of my friend recently. And I have no regret. I was sad and very disappointed of course, but things change and not all female friendships will last. I would like to think that we were a best friend but apparently not.

I have been wondering whether my pride in and sentimental nostalgia for the idea of ‘girlfriendship’ creates only an unrealistic pressure. The sort of pressure that has us hanging in with friendships that don’t really work any more. And stops us from saying things that should be said, suffering in silence instead.

Apart from my old girlfriends from school/college I find now it’s not easy to build the unconditional friendship: no secret too deep to share, no fear too shocking to admit. You know, the one that can accept who you really are so you can be your old self and don’t have to worry every time you open your mouth that you’ll be in trouble.

I used to have a dream that my girlfriendships will last for life, no matter what life might bring to separate them. That’s how I want it to be. But somehow in my world of friendship it’s not happened like that. Not to all my friends though. I still have couple really good ones back home and few in my life now. And I’m happy with that!

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