I Think It Would Be Very Difficult Being Married to Me

I am a total bitch at the moment. Not proud of that but can’t help.

Sometimes, I feel like I just need a break, just for few days for being a wife and mother. Just for few days to exist as my myself, on my own terms. To think. To appreciate what I have. To not compare.

I have this kind of melt down every so often and my husband always says to me ” this is because you always have an easy life, never to think about work the next day, and bla..bla…bla…” that I don’t even want to hear. Why? Because it’s true, well some of what he thoughts not all of them. I don’t feel like I have an easy life totally, because believe me there were times when I had to deal and juggle every thing by myself on my own when my husband was away. Which I felt he had been away quiet a lot of time in the past, but not according to him and he became so defensive about it and we ended up in bitter argument! There were times when I have to deal with my own health and sanity. And it wasn’t easy.

My term of an easy life are: a) you have full time maid who do every thing from cleaning the house until minding your children b) your family is living near/around the corner so you can reach them when you need them c) you can go lunch here and there , dinner out as often as you like, party like a superstar d) shopping free with no limitation e) always on holidays destinations f) children are just your accessories so you can dress them up as cute as Suri Holmes or Shiloh Pitt and people will envy you because you have gorgeous children, and the last g) having a handsome George Clonney look a like, smart, rich and not stingy husband . That’s my easy life!

Do I have all those terms above? Unfortunately not. But I still have an easly life in the eye of my husband. And I know I am being spoilt-brat-person in here. I know how incredibly lucky I am to have children and have them be healthy and to have a partner and enormous support. I know others do it far tougher and some women don’t even have children as much as they desperately would love to. So forgive me if you fall into that category. Yes, I do feel churlish about even voicing complaints like this.

Maybe I just want to complain about my husband, or it’s just me being a damn woman with too much manner? Does anybody else have ever felt that kind of feeling? Like you just being stuck as a mother and wife, you dedicate or slave yourself for your children and husband and at the end of the day you feel empty and not happy?

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