this & that…and happy mother’s day!

Hello Internet!

It’s been a while since the last posting.  As usual, I blamed it on motherhood and being a wife!  Ohh….and also the weather!  It’s autumn here, getting closer to winter soon.  Days getting dark earlier and mornings are just so cosy to lie in bed until my snooze alarm hit me hard on my head! Then hurry up the Boys to get up, get change, quick breakfast, clean their teeth, and off we go.  If I don’t have to work I will normally have my breakfast in peace and quiet, sipping my warm strong coffee with crumpet full of Nutella, while checking on Facebook, twitter, and news.  That’s my morning routines!  But it will be a different story when I need to earn a lit bit $$$, I usually go straight to work after kiss and drop off the Boys.

I love being a mother to my gorgeous boys and wife to my grumpy husband.  I love baking and cooking for my little family.  But I don’t like washing and ironing, while I don’t mind cleaning, dusting, and vacuuming the house.  I like to be there for my boys when they get home from school and I always keen to be their mum’s taxi from basket ball training, footy games to school disco!

But, I also like to be myself.  To get out of my mumsy uniform twice or three times a week.  To be me, a woman who needs a change of scenery, an adult conversation that’s not always about being a mother, and to be a little independent financially.  I am not ambitious enough to be a CEO of big financial corporate, nor high profile lawyer, for example. Or even a teacher.  For the first two, my background education and the capacity of my brain is not related.  Latter, it’s just simply not my cup of tea.

I’ve been working in retail business for about three years, in fashion precisely.  I love fashion, I love clothes, I love to dress people.  But I also still like to work in the office again, either it’s a data entry, receptionist, PA, or anything that related to public relations and media.  You might ask why don’t you get an office job?  Well, it’s not that easy.  I have applied to, got until the interview, and then the only and always obstacle for me  that the working hours is not on school hours.  It is either full time job or part-time but it’s full day.  So to say, until today I haven’t found any office job suit my situation.

Why it has to be on school hour? Simply, because I live here with no close family nor relatives.  I have to manage every thing by myself.  Who will pick up my children from school and take them to footy training or swimming lesson or basket ball game?  As much as I have some closest friends who are kind enough to lend me a help when I need, I can’t  use them to be my personal helper.  Why not sending them to after school care? Honestly, it’s just not worth it. First it’s expensive, second my Boys have lots of after school activities. Though, working in retail it is not always easy too. The hours still can be tricky, especially when it comes to week-end.  So far I have managed pretty good.  That is involved a help from my husband when he’s off work, generous offer from some of my friends at the Boys’ school, and not to mention many visits from my mother.  There are also times that I am struggled and feeling so frustrated and start to question myself, what actually I am doing? Is it worth all the hassle that I have to go through for just couple dollars in my bank account and to boost my ego?

A friend asked me, why do you want to work as in your situation you don’t really need to work?  She’s right.  I don’t really have to work.  But I can’t really answer her question too.  Why do I want to work? I guess, like what I have mentioned above I need adult conversation, I need to go out from my mummy routines, and it’s nice to earn a bit of money of your own.  Am I selfish?  Since I was young and even  in college I always work.  Getting married, moving countries, pregnancy and being a new mum forced me to stop working for such a long time.   When my boys were in pre-primary I started to look around for job.  Now I have been working for almost three years.  It is not an easy road though, in fact pretty tough. There are hundred of times that I told my husband  I will quit, I can’t do it anymore.  But I am still going and struggling.  I feel a bit scared not having my own money, and I am worried that I will fall into typical ladies who just do lunch here and there every day.  Don’t get me wrong, I love being with my friends, I like spending some time with them.  But I don’t want to be the stereotype women/mothers who don’t have any other interest except lunching and shopping every single day.  Yes!  That’s what actually they do.  Starting with morning coffee, follow by lunch, then afternoon tea before pick up time.  Every.  Single.  Day.  I am sorry I don’t mean to judge, and I know it’s not all of women or mothers can do it. Bless them if they enjoy that life style.

In my perfect world it would be very nice if I could work around school hours three times a week, so that I would still have time to pick  up my children from school, take them to their hundred of activities, and still have time to cook and walk my dog!  Being a mother is not always an easy journey but it’s privileged.  I have chosen to be one and I love it.  Even though I will still whine but in the end of the day what matter is your family and being healthy.  Time flies pretty quick that you don’t realize your children are growing up and you will not want to miss every moment of it.  So make your priority, give your children lots of love and cuddles,  and cherish every moment you spend with your family.

Being a mum is the most precious gift I was ever given.  I think we are so very blessed to have Mother’s Day every day.  Happy Mother’s Day to all the beautiful mums out there and to my mother and also my mother-in-law in heaven…

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