How have you been? I hope each of you is well, healthy physically and mentally, and safe where ever you are.
Since my last post which was in April, things are getting much better here in Western Australia. Schools are open as well as restaurants and gym/yoga/sport activities. It feels almost back to normal again, except we are still practising 1.5m distance and washing hands and/or using a disinfectant and only certain numbers of people are allowed in the shops and restaurants. My boys are back to school and their sports activities, it means waking up as early as 5am (in the winter) resumes which I’m not that keen 🙄
Anyway, a couple weeks ago I happened to stumble upon this post on Instagram. It was about Hana Kimura, a professional Japanese wrestler who has died at the age of 22. So young! The cause of her death was not clear, but it looked like a suicide. She posted images of self-harm on twitter apparently along with messages that read as she doesn’t want to live anymore. She had been the target of hundreds of mean tweets and she suffered from cyber-bullying that impacted on her mental health.
Social media are a big platform in our life now, whether you like it or not, it’s a fact. Many of us including myself at least, own one or two platforms, such as Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, and so on.
The use of social media is very strong nowadays. People posting their life, business, family and travel journey, etc, on social media. Lots of people are even earning their income from this platform. Vloggers and Instagram influencers are big on these online platforms. Which is OK. What is not OK is when the interactions on social media become personal hatred comments. That is called the cyber-bully.
Cyberbullying or cyberharassment is a form of bullying using electronic means, also known as online bullying. The forms of bullying can be abusive texts and emails, hurtful messages, images or videos, humiliating others online, spreading nasty online gossip and chat. You probably won’t realise that your comments or interacts on social media can have a serious effect on the mental health of anyone, no matter who they are. You can dislike and/or disagree with someone, but do not bully them especially on open public comments. There is a better way to express your disapproval rather than bullying online.
Cyberbullying often happens to young people, especially teens. They behave in a negative way to a peer online, such as calling them names, deliberately excluding them, or spreading lies or rumours. Cyberbullying doesn’t just happen in kids though. It happens to everyone even adults. I witnessed at least one that I still remember until now and I have also been bullied by harsh and nasty words from at least two people.
Bullies appear to think that it’s ok to unleash their hate on others. There is a better way to express your anger and disappointment toward someone or people rather than being nasty and cruel. When you’re angry you probably don’t think straight, but saying nasty and hurtful words are not acceptable, especially on social media platforms. Using certain animal words and threatening to murder someone is also beyond acceptable. You don’t think the impact of your action on that person you are bullied can be fatal. The words you are said/wrote are forever there, always bubbling in the surface of their brain. It makes them think they are bad people, they’re worthless, and sometimes can lead to depression and anxiety.
I want to write about this from long time ago. But I always hesitate. Because it hurts too much. What had happened to me was not as bad as what happened to my other friend. When I read the article about Hana, it saddened me deeply and somehow I could feel her pain. I’m lucky because I have my family as my supports especially my husband and my boys. Without them, I would be in a dark place for longer. I had my moment where I questioned everything because I didn’t think I deserve to be treated like that. But I let it go and try hard to forget what happened. I’m healing. I’m good.
Sometimes I think, social media has made many of you comfortable with disrespecting people and not getting punched in the mouth for it! So, please don’t use social media or the internet as a weapon. We have too many horrible things happening around the world as is, so please be kind. Also, if you don’t know me, not even friends with me or socialising with me, please don’t take part in bullying me together, because it’s so not cool and childish. If you know me and want to know what’s the real thing, ask me personally and directly, don’t go to the people who spill the tea. Don’t be a noisy buddy!
Be kind. Act consciously.
You are a woman. Skin and bones, veins and nerves, hair and sweat. You are not made of metaphors. Not apologies, not excuses” – Sarah Kay
Don’t let anyone treat you less than you are 💙